The content of their character

F. W. Woolworth store front
While my fam was in Greensboro, NC for our daughter’s graduation, we visited the  F.W. Woolworth’s lunch counter downtown at the corner of Elm and February One streets where we could order a complete turkey dinner for 65¢ or a slice of apple pie for 15¢.

The store closed for business in 1993, but the significance of that particular diner was that on Feb. 1, 1960, four, 17-year-old college freshmen from North Carolina Agricultural and Technical State University began the first peaceful, sit-in protest against segregation, a movement that eventually swept the nation.

Franklin McCain, Ezell Blair, Joseph McNeil and David Richmond sat at the counter, marked for “Whites Only” and tried to order lunch. Refused access, they returned to the store again the next day and were again denied service.

street sign elm and FebruarySoon other students from other colleges joined them. Working in shifts, they continued their protest until the end of their school year. To keep the movement going over the summer, students from a local black high school joined the sit-in until late July, when the store manager finally agreed to serve black customers.

Today, that F.W. Woolworth store is home to the International Civil Rights Center and Museum.

As we toured the facility, we were reminded of the people who were the front line soldiers in the war against segregation and oppression. So many of them children. So many of them died, or were victims of violence and death threats.

In 1960, Ruby Bridges, a six-year-old New Orleans first-grader, was one of the first black children to attend an all-white elementary school. U.S Marshalls escorted her to class because of death threats against her and her family. She was SIX.

Emmitt Till, a 14-year-old Chicago teen visiting his grandmother in Mississippi during the summer of 1955, was brutally murdered for allegedly talking to a white woman. His injuries from being beaten, blinded, shot, hung and drown, were so heinous, he was unrecognizable. When his mother was advised to have a closed-casket service, she refused. Instead, she said she wanted the world to see how vicious his death was.

Down one hallway of the museum, there was a wall of mug shots, more than 1,200 random photos of people arrested for protesting against segregation – white, black, men, women, young, old – all charged with various crimes because they believed that “all men were created equal.”

Walking through the center, with my children, was a very emotional experience. I was horrified, embarrassed, shamed, guilt-ridden, and moved to tears.

I thought of the mother’s of these early activists. I thought of the mixture of numbing fear, crushing grief, and overwhelming pride they must have felt. I could not bear losing one of my children through that sort of senseless violence. I don’t know how these mothers survived their heartbreak.

I’m not a perfect parent, but I have tried to raise my children without prejudice. I’ve tried to instill in them the belief that we are all one world, one people, regardless of race, ethnicity, religion, gender, or sexual orientation.

I have great hope and expectations for their generation. That through them, we can finally get this right. That the only time they will hear about violations of civil rights is while taking a tour at a historic museum.

Submitted as part of Shell’s “Pour Your Heart Out” at Things I Can’t Say.

This week’s Studio30 Plus prompt is “Mom,” and/or “Sprinkler.”

You are my sunshine

sunset at marina

You are my sunshine,
My only sunshine
You make me happy
When skies are grey
You’ll never know dear
How much I love you
Please, don’t take
My sunshine
Away

I was never “That Mom,” the one who had an extensive playlist of lullabies to sing to my babies. When my daughter was a newborn, the only kid’s song I could remember all the words to was the ABCs.

When she went to pre-school, whenever her class worked on the alphabet, she’d doze off. Her teacher worried that she wasn’t getting adequate sleep at home. Once we figured out the problem, I didn’t know whether to laugh (which I did, to the point of snorting) or feel guilty for having such a lame grasp of sleep inducing songs (which I did.)

My son was born four years later.  You’d think I would’ve put the time to good use and learn some more songs. Nope… I sang this little ditty, or “Away in the Manger.”

At least, I learned my lesson (see what I did there? ABCs… school… lessons?) and didn’t interfere with my son’s education… but I may have given him a God-complex.

Submitted to Skywatch Friday, Season 6: Episode 42

Where childhood

ferris wheel

When do we lose that childhood sense of wonder and magic?

There is that invisible boundary between believing in fairies and leprechauns, and only seeing bills and piles of laundry.

I told my son recently that I miss those days when he and his sister were little, and we would build elaborate couch cushion forts in the living room. We’d hide under blankets and picnic on Cheez-its and Hawaiian punch, watching hours of cartoons.

Then we all sort of out grew that. They weren’t little kids anymore, they wanted to do more big kid things, mostly with their friends and not mom. I became immune to silliness, almost allergic to it. My funny bone was replaced by a bone of contention.

Fart and poop jokes no longer made me laugh… it was intellectual humor that evoked a chuckle. The days of mud pies and water fights were gone, replaced by more grown up endeavors. I miss more than my kids being young, I miss me being young at heart.

I need to ride a ferris wheel. To be lifted high in the air, where I can see my future on the horizon. A future that includes balloons and bubbles, cushion forts, coloring books and playing in dirt.

Submitted to Skywatch Friday, Season 6: Episode 40

In his shoes

workboots

If I could walk in your shoes for a day, what would the voices say to me, what would the faces look like? Could I survive your reality or would I go mad?

Prompt #7: Share a favorite holiday recipe

Prompt #13: tell about whose shoes you’d like to walk in for a day.

The Trifextra Weekend challenge: exactly 33 words written in first person narrative.

*Since his pre-teens, my son has struggled with a myriad of mental health issues. Diagnosed at age 12 with severe panic/anxiety disorder and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, he also has bouts of depression, and times when he experiences auditory and visual hallucinations. As much as I try to be empathetic, I can’t totally grasp what he’s going through. Some days, I’ve wished I could be inside his head, to experience what he does, so that I could understand and perhaps be better equipped to help him. Yet, being witness to his episodes of panic and depression, I don’t think I could survive them with as much strength and courage as he does.

Relief came

pine needles

Hanging from the tree house railing, impatiens swing in the breeze. His mother, standing at the edge of the pine needles, discovered the bones of a child wrapped in a pink blanket.

TrifectaCollage

The Trifextra weekend challenge was to choose 33 words from a single page in Elizabeth Strout’s “Olive Kitteridge,” and reshape those words into a piece of (our) own.

Peanut butter wars

pristine peanut butter

Jessie and I were recently lamenting sibling rivalry. We commiserated through short stories depicting what was meant to be examples of hyperbole. What her piece and mine had in common was that while exaggerations, they were also realistic portrayals of how our children actually interact.

We also had similar experiences with our own sister and brother. Jessie told me about how she and her sister had to lay a strip of tape between them on the family car’s back seat. Obviously to delineate territorial borders.

I vaguely recall my parents having to do the same with my brother and me…  battles lines. I have flashbacks of vicious kick fights when a leg, or toe extended past the neutral zone.

Despite all the bruises and pulled hair, not all competitions with my brother evoke bad memories. Perhaps time has mellowed some of the animosity, but there was one constant game of “one-upmanship” that I laugh about today.

Peanut butter….

When we were kids, my brother and I ate a lot of peanut butter. Even now, I love me a PB&J sandwich (preferably with strawberry jelly on whole wheat toast – warm, melty peanut butter makes me smile).

There is something irresistable about the smooth, unblemished surface of a new jar of peanut butter. Like an unsigned, wet concrete sidewalk slab, that blank canvas was an all too tempting reason for my brother and me to duel over who was the first to dip into the pristine, nutty sandwich spread. Not to be the first to have a taste, but to be the first to clandestinely leave a message for the other, written with a toothpick quill.

I still half expect to see a note from him in every jar I open.