I took The Boy into town this week to buy a pair of skate shoes. The Hellboy cat has this annoying habit of sitting in people’s shoes and peeing. His latest impromptu litter box belonged to his Boy. My presence was requested on this shopping trip because I’m easier than his dad to talk into buying truly heinous looking shoes.
After a successful trip to the skate shop, a new pair of standard blue Adidas being acquired, we headed home – only to be caught up in evening road gridlock.
Since the drive home was going slowly, The Boy decided to try calling someone, someone who isn’t always easy to find. As usual, he had to leave a voice message. During his call, I had to deal with two asshats who refused to let me merge into a turn lane… I even had my turn signal flashing, and they still cut me off.
Traffic can make me a little road ragey, and I tend to go all potty mouth. I usually curb my enthusiasm for swearing when other people are in the car with me, but I let slip an f-bomb and a curse on the other drivers’ manhood. The Boy, traumatized, shushed me before my offensive language was background music for his message.
I promptly apologized and to make up for my faux pas, I complimented him on his succinct message. I confessed to how much I hate leaving messages myself and usually just ramble. He in turn confessed that when he leaves a message for any of his friends, it typically only consists of a long string of very loud expletives.
This befuddled me.
“You just told me you cuss in front of your friends, but it bothers you to hear me swear?”
He gave me one of those, ‘thanks-for-stating-the-obvious’ looks, and made a sort of ‘pffft’ noise.
“Oh, you just don’t want your Mother to swear in front of you,” I was now amused.
It would do no good to point out that’s exactly why I don’t like hear him swear in front of me. Even though he’s legally an adult, a mother still doesn’t want to hear her baby cussing. It’s not as cute when they’re 19 years old, as when they were 19 months old.
I guess, that I can’t complain too much. He did inherit his potty mouth from me.