It’s been a while since I’ve had a baby in my house, but I remember the seemingly endless nights of near terminal sleep deprivation.
The crying and wailing, kicking and screaming, and the babies were really loud too.
I remember getting, maybe, two hours of undisturbed sleep. Of not being able to truly relax, listening for any and all tell-tale sounds of distress.
Then they went to school…
The nights weren’t as bad, but the mornings became a constant battle. Week days were a struggle to get up, get ready and get out the door on time for school. Weekends, when a reasonable person could expect to sleep late, were for cartoons and video games, and organized sports. (What genius schedules soccer games at 8 a.m. on a Saturday morning?!)
Precious hours that could be used to catch up on those much needed REM moments, were turned into constant shuttling from home to ball fields, to friends’ houses to school functions, to… you name it, you’re driving to it.
Then they got their own driver’s licenses…
At first I got a little giddy thinking of all that time I’d get back. No more taxi mom, no more being the team van driver. The new teen drivers could get themselves around town, to and fro, without much more than $50 a few dollars for gas.
I knew where they were supposed to be and with whom. Under the ever watchful eye of other parents, even friends, I knew when they deviate from that approved itinerary. I had the added benefit of curfews, both municipally and parentally imposed.
Then they got jobs and made friends I don’t know, go out with those friends after work and drive home at all hours of the night…
That’s when I learned the real meaning of sleepless nights, and watched my sanity totally decay
Trifecta, a weekly one-word prompt, challenges writers to use that word in its third definition form, using no less than 33 words or no more than 333. The week’s prompt is: Decay [intransitive verb \di-ˈkā\] 3: to fall into ruin
Submitted as part of Shell’s “Pour Your Heart Out” writing prompt at Things I Can’t Say. Please stop by to read the other posts, and give a little comment love.
It’s true! Life offers only a small window of time when you’re allowed truly restful sleep. Once you become a parent, that’s gone for good.
I was waiting to see how you’d use ‘decay’ and i think you used it perfectly right at the end. I guess from reading the comments, you’re not alone there! Thanks again for linking up.
This is so stinking true it’s not funny. And now I have the baby AND the older teens, one of whom is out of the house…I may never sleep again.
A soul sister. Or at least a sympathetic sister. I’ve been there, done all of that and am doing it again. (the twenty years after kid) Then in the midst of sleep depravation I got tossed the menopause grenade. Someday, perhaps someday sleep will be mine.
*sigh* I believe you are right, even at 4 my twins seems to be taking every good part of me and destroying it. I wish I could stop the downward spiral for all three of us, but I think that it’s just part of parenting..in my case getting what I wanted and then wishing for days, hours, minutes of rest and sleep
thanks for sharing this Tara, I like it , even if it scares me.
I remember my mother waiting up until we got home from wherever we were on a Saturday night. I never understood that. Now that my own are going on on Saturday nights, I do. But my kids don’t.
So you’re telling me it gets worse? :)
Mine are 10, 8 and 5 but i appreciate the glimpse into my future.
Will I ever sleep thru the night again?
The stages of parenthood! I’m totally with you on every part I’ve been through. I’m not close to the ‘all hours of the night’ stage yet, but I already have an inkling of how I’ll fare given my anxiety-prone personality… Yikes! I’ll remember that — decaying of sanity. (BTW, I’ve been meaning to tell you that I like the new look of your blog; it’s clean and inviting!)
The decaying sanity line cracked me up. I’m not there yet, but I fear for my sanity as well! I’m close to 40 and if I leave my parents’ late at night, I call to let them know when I’m home. If I don’t call, I’ll usually get a call from Mom :)
You’ve written my life. My daughter still calls when she gets home from visiting me to let me know she’s “not in a ditch.” She knows that, otherwise, I won’t sleep
I’m turning 50 in a few months, and I still call my parents once we get home after a visit. I know they would worry.
I understand several of these stages, and am grateful for the continued independence. But I am well aware of the fact that I will worry myself sick when they can go with other kids in cars and stay out till all hours!!! Great response to the decay prompt, and great idea to link up with PYHO too!
We are still working on cleaning up toys. I hope we will be ready for the bigger things to come.
You really never stop worrying, do you? Nicely done.
Wow, so very true!!! My oldest just got his driver’s license and I can’t sleep until he is home safely. What will I do when he goes to his college and I don’t know his whereabouts, and his younger brother will have just gotten his license? Thank God for Xanax!!!!!
lol, loved this! I can relate to the baby part and now with the boys in school the hectic mornings. But I do admit, I do get 7-8 hours sleep! Now I know this is just a breather, right? The sleeplessness again is just around the corner. Great decay. would love to have you link up with my Writing workshop! http://sandrasfiberworks.blogspot.com/2012/05/having-taught-fiction-writing-for-years.html
You nailed all the feelings, cycles of kids growing up. You especially got right the sleepless nights you have waiting up for them as they get older because you really can’t sleep until all your babies are tucked in with the doors locked (mine are 19 and 21). The time gets later and later. For me, it’s about safety.
That’s it. I can’t sleep until my ‘babies’ are home safe and sound. They are 23 and 19. With my daughter, even though she lives on her own, I still worry, especially if she is traveling.
I’m not looking forward at ALL to when Sam learns to drive. He may be banned until age 18.
I know exactly what you mean – I think I worry about my sons just as much now as I did “then”. And my eldest is 30. (ouch) What I don’t seem to be able to get across to them is that I am now, and always have been, their father – and that’s just what fathers do. Worry. Care. Express concern. Lose sleep. kinda like Moms – but without the boobs.
How quickly time passes! We’re still in the school days battles here.
I can remember my mom saying the early sleepless nights wouldn’t end ever, that it just is that way when you have kids. Yup. Every stage has its challenges. However, when they get to be young adults and move out of the house, you can be friends with them. Now that is a sweet, sweet, reward!
I’m at the last stages of that with my eldest right now. She is off for a job interview later today at a bank in the city centre. Gulp! I’m too young to have working offspring!! I’m making the most of my youngest as payback. He’s never going to be allowed to grow up lol!!
I remember those last days well. Now my oldest daughter is in that stage with HER kiddos, and youngest daughter only has a couple of years before she has to worry about her oldest driving. Def. the circle of life right there. :)